How to Balance Growing Your Dreams While Tending Your Kids
* This post is a guest post from my amazingly talented friend, Tricia Goyer. I think you will love it if you have ever dared to dream!
Dreams
Do you have dreams and talents that you'd like to see develop? Have you always wanted to write a book, or host radio show, or run your own business but you are waiting until “after”? After the kids start school. After the youngest graduates. After life slows down. Dreams fulfilled all start with seeds, and they only grow when planted.
When I was 22-years-old, I decided I wanted to become a published author. The desire was there and the first seed was planted when I attended my first writer's conference. In addition to having great aspirations, I was a mom of three kids. (Yes, I was a teen mom, but that's a different story.) I wondered if I could really accomplish my dreams. The answer was YES!
Over time I watered that dream by writing lots, by attending more conferences, and by seeking out mentors. With watering and tending my dreams grew. My first novel was published in 1999. Currently I'm 44 years old, and I have 55+ books in print.
(I just realized that Palm Sunday weekend is the anniversary of my first writers conference. It's odd to think that I attended Mt. Hermon Writers Conference 22-years-ago! I've been pursing writing for HALF my life! How amazing is that?!)
Dreams+Kids
When I first planted my dream-seeds I was a stay-at-home mom. I wrote in the mornings, during naps, and at bedtime. The kids were there, and I somehow made the writing work. I hardly watched television, chose one day a week to do all my errands, and I said “no” to many, many things. Choosing to make the time was hard. The hardest thing was giving myself permission.
Permission to Plant
To follow our dreams, we just need permission. Permission to slow down. Permission to discover our deepest purpose. And permission to follow God-breathed dreams even when we still have kids at home.
I’ve written books and articles while raising kids, and there are times I've feel guilty for not being able to watch a movie with them. I've felt guilt for we have pizza for dinner…again.
Then again, I make sure to be a mom first. We sit around the table at dinner. I take time with each child each day. We serve together, and we laugh together. And once I started following God’s dreams for me, I’ve also been an example to my children of what following God-dreams looks like.
Dreams Grow
The most important part of growing dreams is consistency. If you write 30 minutes a day you can almost finish a book in a year. And it's the same things about growing our kids, isn't it? Loving, giving, and serving each day makes them into amazing people in the long run.
Kids don't grow overnight. Dreams aren't fulfilled in a day. Give yourself permission to start following your dreams, and before long you'll have a harvest of good things to share.
A note from Tricia:
My newest book is Planted by Hope. It's the second book in the Pinecraft Pie Shop series. Here's a short description:
When Hope Miller is offered the plot of land behind the Me, Myself, and Pie shop to start a garden, she jumps at the chance. Finally—some space away from her four sisters! But everyone in town seems to have an opinion about what she should grow and how she should grow it. When the widower schoolteacher, Jonas Sutter, asks if his students at the Amish school can help turn the plot into a community garden, Hope only halfheartedly agrees, wondering if she will ever get the peace and quiet she craves. And will she get anything to grow?
The stories of friendship, community, and unexpected love within these pages will plant real seeds of hope within your heart.
This novel is set in Pinecraft, Florida, where the Amish go for vacation. I was blessed to take my family to Pinecraft twice for research. It's a beautiful place, and it was fun being able to write about it.
What I didn't realize when I first dared to plant my dreams is that my kids would benefit from the harvest. I'm seeing that more and more each day. My writing is something my whole family is thankful for!
Giveaway over! Congrats to our winners! {Still feel free to comment below} 🙂
Connect with Tricia:
Tricia Goyer is a homeschooling mom of ten, grandmother of two, and wife to John. A bestselling author, Tricia has published 50 books to date and has written more than 500 articles. She is a two time Carol Award winner, as well as a Christy and ECPA Award Nominee. Tricia is also on the blogging team at TheBetterMom.com, FortheFamily.com and other homeschooling and Christian sites.
Tricia volunteers around her community and mentors teen moms. She is the founder of Hope Pregnancy Ministries in Northwestern Montana, and she currently leads a Teen MOPS Group in Little Rock, AR. Tricia, along with a group of friends, also blog at Not Quite Amish Living, sharing ideas about simplifying life.
Blog: www.TriciaGoyer.com
Facebook: www.Facebook.com/AuthorTriciaGoyer
A note from Kristi:
I just finished Planted with Hope and loved it! I loved the characters, the way Tricia weaves Christian faith through out,–and the recipes! Yes, there are recipes through out! Here is one of my favorites.
HERE'S THE PERISCOPE TRICIA & I DID TOGETHER TO DISCUSS HER NEW BOOK & PICK WINNERS FOR THE GIVEAWAY!
(Yes, this video is sideways. Sorry. It's formatted on Katch. I'm uploading it to YouTube)
Amy Michaels says
March 7, 2016 at 1:41 pmI am looking forward to reading this book! I think it is important to find that balance and be a role model for our kids to follow their dreams, too.Thanks for sharing this with us! 🙂
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:11 pmThe book is so great, Amy! I really enjoyed it. Yes, it’s so important to find the time! So happy you liked the post. Tricia is so inspiring.
Linda Finn says
March 7, 2016 at 1:53 pmI know just how busy it can be a homeschool mom, who writes and runs my own business. I also care for my husband who is disabled. It is a very hard balance for sure. I can’t wait to read these books and it will be great to just sit and take time for my self to refresh. For me reading is that !
I also know like Tricia what its like to be a teen mom !
Blessings
Linda
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:15 pmYou definitely have a juggling act. All the more reason to continue to cling to the Lord for His strength and guidance as we try to balance everything. I was laughing with Tricia that I never take time to read fiction. It was so refreshing to do exactly what you said–just sit–and read something fun. Thanks for stopping by my site and taking time to comment.
Cindy Jackson says
March 7, 2016 at 2:34 pmThis looks like a really sweet book!
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:15 pmIt was a really sweet story! You will love the characters.
Angel Pennyman says
March 7, 2016 at 2:39 pmWow. I just finished reading this article. It was hard to get through because of all the tears running down my face but I did it. What a blessing and encouragement it is to hear and SEE other moms encourage you in your God given dreams. When God gives you that special little something in your heart, He will make a way for you to achieve it.
As you said, it may take saying no to a lot of things but saying yes to Him and what He is for you is the most rewarding thing — EVER.
Thank you for reminding us that it is ok to give ourselves permission to dream….
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:20 pmAww! Angel, I love that you loved this post! It blessed my heart, too. Tricia has been such a huge support and encourager to me to pursue my dream of writing. I’m so glad her words encouraged you as well. Blessings to you and your sweet family! 🙂 Hope to see you on our scope on Thursday. I love having you on there!
Rebekah says
March 7, 2016 at 2:52 pmSounds like a beautiful story to read.
I also wanted to say that I appreciate this post. I have a hard time following any of my own dreams. With a husband, five children, and homeschooling, there just never seems like there is enough left to invest in anything that just for me. But it’s something I’ve been praying about. Thanks for sharing your story of following God’s dreams for you and seeing them come true. 🙂
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:25 pmThanks for sharing, Rebekah! Yes, it is really hard to find that left over time. For me, I realized that I used TV to unwind each night after my kids were in bed. So, that was what I had to say “no” to in order to find more time. God stirs different dreams in all of us. Can’t wait to see what He does in your heart. Blessings!
Tiffany says
March 10, 2016 at 3:43 amKristi, I think so many people do have that tv habit thinking it relaxes them & then think they don’t have any time and are stressed! It doesn’t really meet a need like making a different choice does. I, too, gave up most tv for other things & found it helped–until periscope! Now I’m losing time again!
Charlie says
March 7, 2016 at 5:52 pmThank you so much for this post! It hits on a struggle I’m sure a lot of moms face…I know I do! Thank you for the encouragement!
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:26 pmSo glad you enjoyed Tricia’s post! 🙂 She’s a wonderful encourager of moms!
Betsy says
March 7, 2016 at 6:15 pmThis looks like a great read! It’s really a challenge to balance my own dreams along with raising kids.
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:28 pmAmen! It is a challenge! As for the book, I really enjoyed it. I haven’t read fiction in so long. It was so nice to get wrapped up in the characters’ lives and struggles and growth.
Judith Martinez says
March 7, 2016 at 6:19 pmI have become afraid to entertain any dreams of my own. It seems like pursuing my dreams would disrupt my husband’s ability to pursue his so I have resigned myself to not doing it.
Kristi says
March 7, 2016 at 9:31 pmI get that, Judith! I’ve struggled with that very thing. The Lord has a wonderful way of bringing about His plan in the right timing. Like Tricia talks about in this article, take it slow. Find little pieces of time. God is a good multiplier! 🙂
Carmen Harrynarine says
March 7, 2016 at 6:45 pmThank you so much for reminding me who I am in Christ, and reminding me that he had placed wonderful gifts in each of one of us to use it to His glory.It’s so easy to forget it in the mist of a busy life with children to care for, to prepare them for heaven, it’s so easy to forget about our own gifts and dreams. But how beautiful that some of this gifts He is bringing to our attention in the form of dreams to be achieved. And how wonderful that he is opening the door to follow our dream at the same time. Thank you
Kristi says
March 8, 2016 at 9:22 pmAmen, Carmen! God is so good! Thanks so much for your beautiful comment.
Kim says
March 7, 2016 at 6:56 pmSounds great! Hope to read the book soon.
Kristi says
March 8, 2016 at 9:59 pmI’m telling you, you’ll love it. It’s so sweet!
Helena says
March 7, 2016 at 7:03 pmOh wow, a new-to-me Amish series–even better, it’s set not far from me (and my sister lives right near Pinecraft). Can’t wait to read these books, even if I don’t wind a copy!
Kristi says
March 8, 2016 at 10:05 pmHelena, I’m so excited that you found this article and this series. How fun that you have family in Pinecraft. I’m new to the Amish genre, and I think I’m hooked. I loved this book! Tricia has several Amish books. I can’t wait to hear how you like this series. 🙂
Shannon says
March 7, 2016 at 7:37 pmThis looks like a great book for me right now. I’m a newly single mom of 6 and am wanting/needing to pursue some dreams. I’m ready to begin fresh and start filling up my drained tank. Thank you for this opportunity!☺
Kristi says
March 8, 2016 at 10:08 pmGod is so capable of filling you up with hope, with His love, and with new dreams. I’ll be praying that He does give you fresh perspective and the energy to love on your six kids. So happy you found this wonderful post by Tricia. 🙂
Alana Lumsden says
March 7, 2016 at 8:13 pmWould Love to read this book, i just realised my dream of owning a book store and am a stay at home mum of four and am 21. i am currently doing a business of administration course to help me get there 🙂
Tiffany says
March 10, 2016 at 3:46 amWow, Alana, a bookstore would be fun! Of course, I’d see so many good things to read to add to my already long list that I might not get any work done!
Susan Kramer says
March 8, 2016 at 4:15 amWhat an encouraging post! I feel sometimes that my dreams should always come last – after my husband achieves his goals as an ultra marathon runner and after my children have achieved whatever their goals might be. I can now see that I have been so silly! I don’t have to go all out with my dream at first, I can start small and build on it little by little. As a former MOPS mom and adoptive mother myself, I truly admire Tricia’s devotion to Teen MOPS and sharing her own adoption stories. I am looking forward to reading her new book!
Rebekah Hargraves says
March 8, 2016 at 4:47 amI really enjoyed this, and it was just what I needed as I try to balance being a Mama of a nearly 14 month old with my blogging/ebook-writing dreams and pursuits. Thank you! <3
Michelle says
March 8, 2016 at 5:22 amAs a homeschool mom who has a God given dream of being a published author, this is super inspiring.
Morgan @ Morgan Manages Mommyhood says
March 8, 2016 at 5:41 amI definitely need this right now! I’m due with my second soon, and with them being close together I fear that balancing my dream of growing my blog to a fulltime business will be crushed.
Arline says
March 8, 2016 at 6:08 amI know God’s been growing a love for ethnic diversity and equality in my heart since I was little, and ever since the protests in Ferguson I’ve been learning and praying and growing and learning and reading like crazy! I don’t know what God will do in my life or my son’s lives because of this dream, but I know I can trust Him to be faithful to His people–all of them!
Would love to enjoy a new novel! I’ve not read any of your books…yet. 🙂
Kim says
March 8, 2016 at 6:51 amI’ve been following Tricia ever since I received one of her books at our MOPS group back in 2006ish!!! I love that you two ladies are collaborating! Jesus lovers unite to share the good, the bad and the ugly! 🙂
Eve says
March 8, 2016 at 7:35 amYour book sounds awesome! Thank you for sharing your insight and the opportunity to win!
Kindly,
Eve
Bonita Timmons says
March 8, 2016 at 10:19 amthis sounds like a very interesting book i am a homeschool mom of 4 kids 24, 18, 7, and 2 yrs old:)) we are a very busy family and my hubbie is a seminary student .. Would love to win the book to help me to rekindle my dreams ..
Blessings
Laurie Moudy says
March 8, 2016 at 2:53 pmI enjoyed reading this article because I would love to being writing and blogging but can’t seem to find the time. Tricia has some great advice and my hope is to get started soon! Thank you Kristi for your encouragement!
Tricia Goyer says
March 8, 2016 at 6:22 pmA little every day makes a HUGE difference!
Joybird6 says
March 8, 2016 at 3:03 pmThanks for the chance to win a copy of the new book! So funny – I just finished reading Made with Love – in just about 24 hours! I’d love to win a copy as I’m sure it will be just a little bit before my library gets a copy! =) Hospitality is one thing I love – and our house is SO tiny that it feels impossible (6 people in 903 sq ft!). Our dream is to own a home large enough to host ALL THE PEOPLE! =) -Joy
Tricia Goyer says
March 8, 2016 at 6:21 pmI’m so glad that you enjoyed Made with Love!!
Missy Stevenson says
March 8, 2016 at 4:09 pmGreat information and so true.
Ana (@ANAWINSblog) says
March 9, 2016 at 6:47 amI so needed this when you posted it on Instagram. I have finally gotten a few minutes to catch up on blog reading! Just recently I have started saying no to some things so that I leave enough margin in my life for parenting well while juggling this blogging dream. Balancing our dreams along with parenting, being a wife and housekeeping is definitely an art that we need to keep practicing in order to perfect it over time.
I didn’t know Tricia wrote Amish novels, I am addicted to that genre!
Faith says
March 9, 2016 at 4:21 pmThank you for a great post! I appreciate seeing mothers encouraging other mothers to not shy away from pursuing the dreams and talents the Lord has given them! I am a homeschooling mother of five and felt the Lord lay on my heart to pursue a doctorate degree in Natural Health about 6 years ago. Now I am just a few months away from obtaining that degree. Goals, even large ones, can absolutely be accomplished by spending spare minutes here and there to reach them. I love that my kids see me meeting with clients in our home or engaged in reading/researching instead of spending spare moments frivolously. Now they join me with their books and we study together! It’s been wonderful and a great exercise personal in discipline for me!
Oksana says
March 9, 2016 at 7:03 pmSounds like an amazing book. At times we forget our dreams with our busy schedule. Would love to read this book.
Amanda Tolles says
March 9, 2016 at 7:22 pmI’m looking forward to the scope tomorrow and to reading this book.
Tiffany says
March 10, 2016 at 3:57 amI am so very impressed that Tricia has written 55 books! Then, on top of that, she’s a mom to so many! I really don’t know how; that’s a lot of dedication & structure, for sure.
I’ve fairly recently been tempted to write a book & yet haven’t managed, but I don’t have nearly the same busyness in the last 9 months since I started to really wonder about the possibility. (It may have been in the back of my mind a long time, but I used to work too much for that possibility.) Looking at this & all she does, I really don’t have a valid excuse not to try. But it seems so unlikely for so many reasons. But this article is a good reason to evaluate dreams!
Jessica says
March 10, 2016 at 4:33 amThis article was so encouraging! As mothers we have so many different hats that we wear throughout our lives …..so it’s so important that we find balance in all that we do. It’s also important to not forget that the Lord has a created us for a purpose and that those gifts and talents that He has instilled in us need to be nurtured and developed to accomplish His purpose. As mothers we need to be encouraged to continue to dream and know it’s okay to do so. Thanks for the reminder and encouragement!!
Tonya Gastineau says
March 10, 2016 at 7:58 amI’ve read many Amosh novels, never one about where they go on vacation! I look forward to reading this!
Alyssa says
March 10, 2016 at 1:01 pmLove love love this and must get this book! I love Tricia she has always encouraged me online. As a mom who has never homeschooled and is about to and also has a dream / career to follow I was interested in this post and the periscope where you interviewed her. Thanks Kristi- – you too are so inspiring!
Jodie de vere says
March 10, 2016 at 1:14 pmI looking forward to hearing more and encouraged from the blog, I have permission to grow in the midst of the seasons.
Kristi says
March 10, 2016 at 6:38 pmTHANK YOU EVERYONE FOR COMING OVER & COMMENTING TO ENTER TO WIN TRICIA’S NEW BOOK, PLANTED WITH LOVE!
The winners have been notified for the giveaway! We’d still love to hear your comments on this awesome article. Thanks for getting involved and visiting Raising Clovers!
Nancy Drew says
March 18, 2016 at 4:18 amGreatly written Tricia!
Look forward to reading this! Will be glad to share it with my kids! <3