WATCHING OUR FOREVER WORDS

Today I felt frustrated. I'm not going to get into the “who” or “what” of the issue. The details are not important.

What I was surprised by was that my gut reaction was that I wanted to share about it. I wanted to tell someone — talk to someone. I wanted to feel confirmed that I was okay to be feeling wronged.

I thought maybe I should ask for “prayer.” Prayer is an okay way to tell someone about what's going on, right?

WRONG! Prayer can be gossip!

How many times have I sat in a women's Bible study group and listened to someone bash their husband or friend, but then just ask for prayer for that person. Gossip disguised as prayer is still gossip. [Tweet “Gossip disguised as prayer is still gossip. @RaisingClovers”]

Women, we often struggle with this! I'm a woman. I'll own it. I know I've done this before.

God knows that we struggle with this. He had Paul pen in Titus 2:3, “…teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good.” We won't jump into the wine part here, but we need to pay attention to the “slanderers” part. Slanderers are gossipers. Yikes!

We live in a day and age where we have forever words. Our words are no longer just spoken. Our words are now forever recorded on the world wide web. Whenever we vent online, our words are captured forever. Anything on social media, even on a private page, is lasting.

We have to watch our forever words!

We need to be careful. I need to be careful! I needed to stop and pray! I shared about this topic on a Periscope the other day and someone chimed in with, “Take it to the Throne, not the phone.” I love it! That's exactly right. [Tweet “Take it to the Throne, not the phone! @RaisingClovers”]

Today, luckily I stopped before I said anything.

I realized I had to pray and seek the Lord first. I had to pray for God's joy and His covering over the issue. I had to seek His forgiveness for the bitterness that I was storing up in my heart.

I had to stop myself today. I admitted to the Lord that I felt hurt. I needed Him to heal my heart. This way when the opportunity to talk about things with my offender came, I wouldn't be reacting and speaking from a place of hurt. If I am staying in the place of hurt, then I'm not helping the situation. I'll be coming at that person with those hurt words.

Hurt people, hurt people! Harsh words often come from those who have been wounded themselves. [Tweet “Hurt people hurt people! Harsh words often come from those who have been wounded themselves.”]

I had wanted to somehow make them see, get their attention, so they'd know that I felt hurt. But then I realized that I'd just be playing games. No! I needed to take it to the Lord!

The wise thing to do was to keep mouth shut.

Zip it! Lock it! Put it in God's pocket! Give God the key to your lips. [Tweet “Zip it! Lock it! Put it in God's pocket! Give God the key to your lips. @RaisingClovers”]

We want our words to encourage each other. Edification, not gossip. I want healthy relationships in my life. So, I need to be so careful about what I'm saying.

I've been writing several blog posts on marriage lately. Some for my blog and some for other people's sites that haven't gone live yet. I've learned to have my husband read them first. It's his story as much as it is my story. Even if I'm trying to minster to others by sharing a story from my marriage, it doesn't really minister to my husband (my priority relationship) if I'm sharing outside of his comfort zone.

I always want my husband to feel like I have his back, not that I'm attacking him behind his back. Marriage is sacred. I want to guard my marriage.

This goes for my kids as well. I try to be careful that I'm sharing things that won't be embarrassing to them as they become adults.

We did a little life lesson with our kids a few years back. We had them squeeze a tube of toothpaste out as fast as they could. We timed them. They had to get every last drop out. We got really excited for them and clapped. Then we told them that they had to get all of it back in the tube in the same time. They started to try, but quickly learned it was impossible.

That's how it is with our words. Once they are out, there is no way to get them back.

Karen Ehman has a new book out right now called Keep It Shut. It was recommended to me during my Periscope on this topic of “watching our forever words.” I'm going to check it out. Thought I'd share it with you, too. {You can see the Periscope video below}

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